Pretty boy

A daring thought typed out

You told me your back hurt, so I buy coconut oil

I cut my nails short and stretch my arms

Eat an apple 

Cut another 

I let you lay the softness of your soul 

On my lap while

I brush your hair

Taste the sweetness of the fruit on

Your lips

To my hand 

You bring them 

Softly

And my fingers press in your skin tenderly 



What is beauty if not the way sunlight holds you in glow?

What is love if not found in the rawness at our equal embrace?

And what is kindness if not the way you let me choose the music in the car?



I want to learn the way you take your coffee 

I want to learn how you make your bed

I want to learn you frequently 



Let your sweat reach my tongue and

Your flesh fill my heart — if you dare

        if I dare

            to pick that hike



I told you life had been unfair, that it will continue to be

And you kissed my forehead, told me

It doesn’t have to be



That night under the city lights and the cigarette smoke, I felt my stomach make roots in the ground. 

I saw the ants carry their food and saw the leaves sway their song.



And I see the people walking by,

All dressed in clothes dark as death, in plastic black jackets with logos that mean no sense

We stare down at our phones, because the city offers no stars to look up to, 

And we would buy and consume anything to forget the thinness of life and the misery of a corrupt society

We are mourning our scars as if the person next door doesn’t carry the same

Sadness of a forgotten unity



I am tired.

Tired of pretending individuality.

Tired of men not being held with accountability.

Tired of this screen screaming nonsense lies at me.



I want to listen to the wind in between the trees and hear the virtues of slowness and the beauty of diversity.



I want to bite and fuck and moan the essence of your body top and beside and inside my aching complexity.



I want to give you my love, my time and my energy.

As I’ve given too freely, 

Now I give carefully.



Because I trust you, 

Completely.